- This weekend I was sitting at home and pondering Lord of the Rings. This is something I do in quiet moments, when I’m not thinking about important things, like the ending of How I Met Your Mother, or wondering why it is so quiet and where my kids are. I have come to the conclusion that Frodo was a huge whiner. Sam might have been a great friend, but he was really an enabler. I think that Frodo needed a tougher traveling companion. Like maybe a plumber from New Jersey. Every time Frodo got whiny, the plumber would have some choice words and a story for him. “You think this is bad, little guy? I was on a job one Christmas Eve. The sewer line backed up into the basement, and we had to unclog it all while standing in eight inches of poop. Mordor is a cakewalk compared to that. Suck it up, buttercup. There’s no way I’m carrying you up Mount Doom, I’ve got a bad back.” Also. He would never have been tempted to steal the ring because it wouldn’t have been gaudy enough for his wife.
- Ahhh, quiet moments. It was really quiet for a while last night. After I was done thinking about the end of How I Met Your Mother, I decided find out why it was so quiet. I found my ten year old trying to hypnotize my six year old with a Steamtown National Historical Park pocket watch. This was really amusing. If he did end up hypnotizing the little guy, I was totally going to use it to my advantage. I had a list of requests. “Tell him that he needs to try some foods that aren’t chicken nuggets, pizza, or strawberries.” “Tell him that he needs to clean his room once a week.” “Tell him he needs to use his ‘indoor’ voice at all times.”
- My favorite football team took a tough loss this weekend. When this happens I have to really fight to adjust my attitude. It can take anywhere from one to two hours. That’s not bad, considering that it used to take all the way to Wednesday when I was younger. I’ve tried not caring as much, or watching the games with more of an analytical eye. You know what happens? I don’t get as upset about the losses, but I don’t enjoy the wins as much either. I’ve decided that my relationship to my favorite teams is meant to be an emotional one. The third and fourth quarters of games are meant to upset your stomach. Last minute field goals for the win are meant to make you feel good until next Sunday. In the end, when your team wins a championship, you are supposed to feel like a part of it. That being said. There are some franchises that have been emotionally abusing their fans for years. In fact, I think that they should be required to provide complimentary therapy for anyone who buys season tickets. (You hear me Philadelphia and Cleveland?)
LINKS
- The best selfie ever.
- A ghost fleet of ships recently washed up on the shores of Japan.
- On the last day of November. November Rain from the 1992 VMA’s.
- Aerial views from a North Korean helicopter tour. I found it kind of fascinating.
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